April 19, 2010

Bring on the Drama Llamas!

0 comments Posted by Ace of Hearts

Sorry Guys, I know it's been a while since I've posted... and I said I would, but you know how mind-numbing exams and things can get. Seriously! >__< I'm really really sorry.

Anyways, let's talk a little about being a Lolita and how to deal with our communities. As you might have guessed, being a Lolita isn't easy at all and there always seems to be some kind of drama just lurking around. (Yes, thank you to my friends, Claire and JC, for demonstrating "drama" XD)

Why do we always have drama? It's like we create drama for the hell of it. Is it fun? For some reason it's just easier to talk about this person and that person and unfortunately, it IS interesting. Is it human nature to be a drama llama? I wouldn't say that the drama is only in North America or even in Europe, I mean cattiness is everywhere. Like it's sweeter counterpart, Love, drama knows no bounds. So.... here are some questions for Lolitas (if you're not, just pretend you are or pretend the "Lolita" clothing is some hot designer brand! ^^;;) plus some further questions for discussion. None of them are the right answer, they're just topic starters.

What would you do if you....

1. Met someone who said that they were a Lolita but were dressed in completely terrible "ita" Lolita clothing?
  • Would you teach them? Tell them exactly what they did wrong, and give them pointers such as where to shop?
  • Would you laugh at them and just ignore them?
  • Would you want to teach them, but don't know what to say for fear of being critical and hurting the person's feelings
2. Met someone who was dressed beautifully but said what YOU were wearing was horrifying and gave you a lecture?
  • Would you be offended? Ignore what they say?
  • Would you take their critique as a passerby comment and not think of it at all?
  • Would you be grateful to receive the critique and take everything they say into account to improve yourself?
3. Met someone who was dressed terribly but criticised your outfit?

  • Would you let them have it and criticise them back?
  • Would you take what they say and just keep your own comments to yourself?
  • Would you not say anything, but later tell your friends about it and have them make an "unbiased" decision on who was right?
4. Met someone who did not have a "cute" or "pretty" face, but was dressed beautiful... and enjoyed criticising everyone?

  • Would you ignore them, just be polite and not take anything they say seriously?
  • Would you be annoyed? And perhaps tell them off?
  • Would you be nice, pretend to be their friend only to laugh at them later with your other friends?
5. Met someone who was beautiful and was dressed beautifully, but criticised everyone?

  • Would you think them as stuck-up, brandwhore, or elitist?
  • Would you take what they say to heart and try to be as beautiful as they are?
  • Would you feel envious that you could not be like them?
6. Met someone who to your face told you that you were cute & was your "friend", but then turned around & laughed behind your back?
  • Would you talk to her and tell her that she hurt you?
  • Would you pretend that it didn't matter to you or insult her back?
  • Would you rage on it to your friends?
7. Had a friend who was stuck up and constantly criticised everyone else but failed to see her own mistakes?
  • Would you tell her? 
  • Would you keep it to yourself because you believe she will get hurt?
  • Would you discuss her with your other firends?
8. Were being talked about as a stuck-up, spoiled, brat who was annoying and insulting to everyone else?
  • Would you want to know that people were saying this about you?
  • Would you be insulted and attack everyone who criticised you?
  • Would you take the insults as problems that you might need to deal with and try to change your attitude?
I think there are questions that we don't want to ask, and we don't want to discuss. I mean, if I was doing something wrong, I may not want to know about it. I might be insulted to hear about it and therefore become very upset and lash out the people who said the "mean" thing. But perhaps maybe they were right? Then perhaps I would have only proved to them that I am indeed who they said I was. I always think that knowing is better than not knowing... even IF , ignorance is bliss. After awhile you realize how it's almost impossible to not be in some kind of drama and how it can be so hard to even discuss the above questions because you have no idea what the other person will do. Reminds you of chess or poker, doesn't it? If the stakes are high, we might not want to move or act in a certain way that will make us "lose"... but if the stakes are low... we might just do something.. unexpected. Who knows? 

Please, please, answer away! XD

 

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